Scared for My LIFE

I'm not sure that I have ever been scared about my life much... Obviously I have been trying to get healthy and make myself a better life so I can do all the things I want to without feeling depressed and too overweight.  Well, my eyes were peeled wide open to the fact that I need to seriously focus on losing weight because if I don't I probably will die young.  That to me is VERY scary! 

You all know that I did the Climb for Air yesterday.... well to the best of my ability.  As we were walking through the skywalk to get to the start area we seen a few paramedics and firefighters pass by us with stretchers and I kind of jokingly said oh that will be me.... I wasn't feeling to excited at this point to go through with the climb... I was very nervous cause I didn't practice much and I'm also a smoker which this Climb for Air is for the Lung Association so I should have been well aware that this would work my lungs... in prep I decided to quiet for the week before the climb in order to feel a little stronger while doing it... I did  have a few but I tried to limit myself, in hopes it would help me do better.... 

 Unfortunately it did not help at all really.... I started climbing the first building and felt good till about floor 7 and then I started to get tired and my lungs were burning SO bad I could hardly

breath at all... at that point I started to get scared...

I wanted to finish and not fail myself or the people that supported me for this climb..

my body just had other plans and totally shut down... I did make it to the top of 16 floors and I 

wasn't sure how I felt or anything... Everything was blurry and I tasted blood and I could not for the life of me catch my breath back... I decided to sit out for the rest of the buildings cause I just couldn't catch

my breath and I was scared... I didn't want to start the next building and fail it cause I already

felt I had failed because I only accomplished one building and that to me was a Struggle!

I'm really happy that I signed up for the climb... I may have only accomplished one building

but I think I have seen my life flash before my eyes and it's time to change... I don't want to be the girl that fails herself and her family and friends because she couldn't give up eating the 

wrong foods or to quit smoking... I want to be the girl that people are proud of and want to look

up to as an example that you can do anything you put your mind too! 

I still have a bad cough today after the climb but it reminds me that I don't need to smoke for

any reason cause not only will it hurt my throat at this point but there are way 

healthier ways to relieve stress then to light up something that could eventually be the

cause of my death or contribute to my death.

I'm not perfect and I will fail sometimes but I have to change and I don't want to let myself

or my family down because of my bad habits.  This will take a lot of support from

others and disipline for myself... also dedication

to put in the work it takes to get my life back and to keep it!

Think about your life and what's important to you! That is your motivation!